I need clarity!! I don't know what I want?!?

Okay Well I'm 17 a cancer female, dating a pisces female. Let's say I'm bisexual for now, or actually I don't know what I am. At times I think I'm just straight because I say I'd never end up marrying a girl, but in reality I'm just scared of what people think. Also I've never been serious, like dead serious with a guy.So I'm like thinking to myself, since I've never been serious with a guy, I can't be so quick to judge whether I'm lesbian, or straight. The longest relationship I've been with a guy is a month. He was a Taurus. Then I dated a Aquarius guy for less than 2 weeks. Then I "dated" this Sagittarius for like also less than 2 weeks.Then I dated this Pisces girl for about 6months, then I broke up with her. In a way she was my first girlfriend EVER. The other one I didn't see her, or do NOTHING with her. Now this girl for the first 6 months wasn't good at all, like it was the worst, but in a way you know we had those MOMENTS.Somehow I got attached to her. I liked her out of nowhere. So let's just say I made her go to the other way, or try and see. Back then I always did everything, I was like seriously dead on the BEST girlfriend ever! %26amp; Not literally everyone knew but they were like "you should be my girlfriend".haha.[not to brag] when me %26amp; her went out I ALWAYS paid. %26amp; It wasn't always Mc.Donalds %26amp; Burger king. It was the cheesecake factory, islands, %26amp; movies. Kinda fancy for a 17yr old.haha. I always planned the dates %26amp; activites. I always told her how I felt. Because I asked people for advice %26amp; like always EVERYONE says tell her how you feel. So through out those 6 months starting around 3-4months I started telling her on %26amp; on. Then I told her "This is the last talk, after this I'm just breaking up with her".but then at times I could understand her, I was her first girlfriend %26amp; whatnot. But you know us cancers we don't wanna break up %26amp; whatnot. so after that "talk" I gave her 2 more %26amp; then came that final day because I was always tired of doing EVERYTHING. But the final day I was all confident %26amp; happy I was doing it.So the day before I broke up with her I cried like a baby, at night. So after school I was like "can we talk" ...so she was like "yeah sure"...so then I told her "you know what I don't think this is working out, we should just be friends" she was like "ok, can i go back with my friends" i was like "sure sure go ahead" %26amp; in my mind i was like wtf?!? what a bitchh! did she not care or what? so then after that i was like i'm not going to talk to her for ****! so then i saw her i avoided her MEAN STATUS, it was hard because one of my closest friends was very close with her too, %26amp; my other friends knew her too, so I had to go from place to place. So then like me curious %26amp; nosey, I can't let go of the past. One time I go through her myspace reading her comments telling her friend how mean was I because "she always wanted to talk to me" %26amp; I was avoiding [in reality i kinda was] but if she'd talk to my face I wouldn't ignore her. so then after reading that i was like ima talk to her, so i sent her a message on myspace. ever since that we started talking *%26amp; getting closer as time passed by being separated for 2 months. I decided to pop out of nowhere to her house, early in the morning.After that I guess we had some connection.Then some time passes %26amp; she asks me out on myspace? So then I say yes, but that day I talked to her on the phone, I asked her "Are you still a virgin"? %26amp; she says no. So then I'm shocked %26amp; felt insulted. She lost it to some guy she BARELY, %26amp; I was just stunned on how EASY she was, but then I said I have no right to judge so I just got over it %26amp; I kinda did. And now that were going out she left the country for about 2 weeks. Before she left that exact day I told her on myspace, [since I couldn't see her that]



Well "Her name" I hope you have fun on your T.J trip.

I'm gonna miss talking to youu. :[

Arguing with you %26amp; whatnot.

Even if you're leaving for 2 weeks or 1.



Without you, there's nothing to do.

With me, all I need is you%26lt;3

:D



Byee babyy%26lt;3

Take care.



All she did was read it, she wasn't in a hurry to leave.

[So don't say that because the next day she logged on,

replied to other stuff]



And now I feel bad because I went with this guy, today.

We had fun(: [No cheating involve] but there was at times.

Where he hugged me, in a special way. And now hes' telling

me how beautiful I am, he loves my smile %26amp; whatnot.

And I got to know him not much, but I told him I dated a girl.

And they way I talked to him about her, he was like damn you really liked her? I was like yeahh. %26amp; I didn't mention I went back

with her, because if it that moment I did, things would have been way different %26amp; boring. And I'm pretty sure she wouldn't mention

to anyone me %26amp; her are going out...



Soo please some wise advice on what I should do. %26amp; I want to

know if my sexuality is a phase or not, or what?!I need clarity!! I don't know what I want?!?
1. Continue this, cause you obviously like her. Let things come as they will. Eventually you will figure out who you really are and what you really want.



2. Stop judging your life based on astrology. Most of that sh*t is utter bull, and if you live your life by it you are very likely to end up unhappy.
i have ADD, and fell asleep.



sorry.



wow. wall of words.



please, for the sake of our eyes, consider paragraph returns next time.I need clarity!! I don't know what I want?!?
give the girl a chance......dont write so much.